Joel's Teeth

I really, seriously try to avoid saying things that might offend my religious/spiritual friends.  That's not easy for one who enjoys nasty snide sarcasm. Sometimes it just pops out before I can stop it.  It happens when I watch Joel Osteen.  He sure has a lot of pearly whites.  How can anybody take him seriously? There, I said it.  Will I go to hell? Will my Joel fan friends unfriend me?