Those Modern Lutherans

Garrison Keillor has a wonderful understanding of traditional mid-American church folks and their difficulty dealing with change. He took a delicious poke at those Florida Churches.
Down there, "They use a little skinny Bible. They took out all the discouraging parts. God is your best friend, Jesus is your boyfriend and whatever you need, you got it."
Update:  That was quite a few years ago.  Now Lake Wobegon Lutheran has a Lady Pastor, the subject of some pretty funny stuff.

Christmas myth, tradition

I am equally uncomfortable with fundamentalists who insist that every word of the Bible is literally true and the "reverse fundamentalists" who stay away from church because it's all a man-made fairy tale. Christmas is a time to turn off your intellect and appreciate the beauty of tradition and myth. I believe in Santa Claus and the Easter bunny and Columbus but I'm not sure about Toledo. You won't get that unless you are a Stan Freberg fan.

Passing of the Peace

Being introverted, hung-up and not very sociable, I am not comfortable when the passing of the peace in church turns into a 10 minute session of running around, hugging everybody and saying silly things like "God loves you and so do I." It's all I can do to keep from saying, "I suppose God loves you but I don't even know you." Staying in my pew and shaking hands with those near me is about all I can handle.

Religious People

Ok, so some religious people are dangerous. Most of US are goofy but harmless.

Churches are getting Goofier

I have quit going to church. I am old. Church is for the young. I just stay home and think holy thoughts, mostly.